THING 1:
I made this collage on a screenshot on the ride from London to Cambridge. I had fun doing it. I love Paint (the program). (First things first: the above image is from the band Atlas Sound, not some questionable something else)
EXIT NOTES FROM 3 days in the UK. (And it is never a dull 3 days... it is always just sprinkled with surrealism and absurdity... it is always an issue I re-encounter every time I come here, brain says: "wait, ...I am not REALLY in America even though most sensory input tricks my brain into thinking I am... English: check. wildstyle-rampant-rodeo of capitalism/consumer culture wonderland: Check! People being automatically polite for no apparent reason: check. Constant overbearing police presence everywhere: CHECK." But thannk god I am in an English speaking country again so my poor brain can have a rest from German.

THING 2:
ME:"But that isn't even a liquid!"
Airport Security Searcher scanner guy who is taking his sweet-arse time to scan every piece of pocket lint in my bag: "Its a paste."
"Oh... But that... THAT bottle is only half full!"
"It is the size of the bottle in ml that counts, not the fullness..."
"Oh..." THINKING: "Where these rules here the other day?"
I constantly rotate DVDs from my parent's house - taking them out on loan and bringing them back a few months later. Most of them are mine anyways, but this time...
He pulls out Richard Linklater's Before Sunset. I shrink back and stare at the floor.
He pulls out a special edition DVD of Disney's Peter Pan which I automatically blurt: "That's my nephew's!"
"Sure 'tis, mate."
I wasactually bringing it for a friend's 5-year-old son...
I then watch in horror as he pulls out Dawson's Creek Series one DVD set-
"That... THAT's my sister's!!!"
"SUUUURE 'TIS, mate, SURE it is..." as he collects my shaving cream and shampoo in a plastic bin to have it particle-scanned.
We didn't agree on much... but one thing we COULD agree on: the greatness of Pilgrim's choice extra mature cheddar. (Or just cheddar in general.) Which he also pulled out of my bag, inspecting it with a notably special loving tenderness...
Ugh.