Thursday, February 26, 2009

Post Titled: Tiny Little Penises
Post Titled: A very brief and open letter to the Bundesrepublik Deutschland which I have written about a gazilion times already (but not posted.)

Dear Angie,
I love you so much but one thing Germany MIGHT JUST THINK ABOUT DOING is stop molesting its people with all these petty, nit-picky little laws and rules. It is like constantly being swarmed by tiny little penises with wings!
Suggested new Slogan: "LET GO, GERMANY! Let your people GO!" (as in go-go-go! let them DO! you have nothing to lose!) This is more than just "Think outside the box"- this is "smash the fucking box! dissolve the box with your mind! box the box up and ship it to Abu Dhabi! Forget about the box, the box is NOT EVEN THERE! Like Jennifer Connelly says to David Bowie in the 1986 film Labyrinth "YOU HAVE NO POWER OVER ME!" Refuse the box its power, after all- it is only painfully self-imposed, forged by the blind hands of best intention. In the words of Radiohead "you do it to yourself, you do- and that's why it really hurts!" Stop hurting yourself, Germany!- it is painful to watch and is scares a lot of the clever people off! C'mon, Angie- Germany needs a new reason to live!
The way things are going I honestly doubt Germany can/will ever change, but can she prove me wrong- just this once? That would be delightful.


MfG,
TAR
ART
RAT

berlin tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google 2008

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4 Comments:

Anonymous z said...

why do you believe in angela merkel? (i know it's common to address letters to "dear mister president", but this ain't obama country) and since when does change come from the government? politicians will only act when the house is already on fire.
remember, merkel was the protégé of a man, who put this country in a 16 year long state of sleep. and when they finally (it was the unification that saved the chancellor's ass in 1990) got rid of him in 1998, the new government was also afraid of unpopular reforms which had been long overdue. it was only when schröder got re-elected, that they realized they had to act (even if it was against the will of his own party). when first successes of said Reformeifer became apparent, it was merkel (now chancelloreuse) claiming the credit for it. the funny thing is, when merkel first came into office, she said that Entbürokratisierung was her top priority. the only thing merkel does, is hopping from topic to topic (EU-Verfassung, Klimawandel, Artenschutz, Bildungsgipfel (a total farce)), having pictures taken in front of icebergs, while watching her male rivals decapitating themselves.

i read in an Internationale Presseschau today that norwegian newspaper "Dagsavisen" wrote in an article about germany dealing with the economic crisis: "Kanzlerin Merkel hat bislang nur ihr übliches Rezept: Sie wartet ab und hofft, dass sich das Problem von selbst löst. Um die Macht muss sie trotzdem nicht fürchten, denn ein Wahlsieg der SPD ist derzeit alles andere als wahrscheinlich."

i can't imagine the state of dispair this country has to face, to hope for a different election outcome. and with the next government (including fdp) everything will become even worse - und kein obama in sicht.

p.s. using italics doesn't work that well (at least) on my screen

p.p.s. admit it, the whole post was about the title with the penises ;-)

5:53 am  
Blogger "Post-Google" by TAR ART RAT said...

Dear z,
yes, the post is all about the title, but the inspiration came from yet another dumbfounding letter from what I call "the Government" which is any state or federal instituion -and mor often than not the ones who love to make my life difficult,
but thanks for the realty-check comment! !

correct, italics and IMPACT font don't mix well-

no, you're right, change doesn't usually come from "the government" -reminds me of that SONG "The Only Thing Governments Have Done" by Ryan Harvey

the "Dear Angie" was more of an afterthought, but I didn't know who to address it to.
and I think I just found my new favorite word of the day: Entbürokratisierung!!

10:13 am  
Blogger "Post-Google" by TAR ART RAT said...

off the topic: straw poll
QUESTION: would the average young, university-educated German be familiar with the term "Golden Parachutes"?

10:19 am  
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