Friday, February 27, 2009

Post Titled: On Röyksopp and the associations we have with their music/videos, all you would ever know all on one chat:
Post Titled: and whynot shout out a hurray for Karin Dreijer Andersson

Patrick: thought you might like this:


me: rad! I actually really like Rökysopp
Patrick: i learned about them from the stupid geico caveman commercial
not sure if you've seen that
seeing as you're in germany
me: I saw one when I was back in the states last summer, I didn't get it.
which creeped me out, I thought I should be able to "get" everything---
oh well,
Patrick: ha, you've been gone too long
american pop culture has moved on without you!
here's the commercial:

me: we torrent stuff!
Patrick: ha
me: not much, though
Patrick: i used to love bittorrent
then comcast started dicking with packets
i need a new ISP
me: this is the video that got me into royksöpp, they were playing it non-stop when I was in iceland, which is appropriate bcause that' what iceland looks/feels like in winter (NOTE: this is an exaggeration)

Patrick: yeah
i've seen that one
good video
i guess i'll avoid iceland in the winter
ah
ha
me: no, it is rad, but intimidating, like teh weather or landscape might just decide to squash you at any second. kind of an adrenaline rush...
Patrick: hm
that sounds pretty cool actually
me: dfinitley "something else"
berlin tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google 2008 rokysopp royksopp roeyksoep roksop roeyksup roksyop roekysoep
roeyksoepp norwegian opo pop music Earth invaders: Röyksopp's Happy Up Here video

Labels:

Google Book Search

Thursday, February 26, 2009

Post Titled: Tiny Little Penises
Post Titled: A very brief and open letter to the Bundesrepublik Deutschland which I have written about a gazilion times already (but not posted.)

Dear Angie,
I love you so much but one thing Germany MIGHT JUST THINK ABOUT DOING is stop molesting its people with all these petty, nit-picky little laws and rules. It is like constantly being swarmed by tiny little penises with wings!
Suggested new Slogan: "LET GO, GERMANY! Let your people GO!" (as in go-go-go! let them DO! you have nothing to lose!) This is more than just "Think outside the box"- this is "smash the fucking box! dissolve the box with your mind! box the box up and ship it to Abu Dhabi! Forget about the box, the box is NOT EVEN THERE! Like Jennifer Connelly says to David Bowie in the 1986 film Labyrinth "YOU HAVE NO POWER OVER ME!" Refuse the box its power, after all- it is only painfully self-imposed, forged by the blind hands of best intention. In the words of Radiohead "you do it to yourself, you do- and that's why it really hurts!" Stop hurting yourself, Germany!- it is painful to watch and is scares a lot of the clever people off! C'mon, Angie- Germany needs a new reason to live!
The way things are going I honestly doubt Germany can/will ever change, but can she prove me wrong- just this once? That would be delightful.


MfG,
TAR
ART
RAT

berlin tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google 2008

Labels:

Google Book Search

Post Titled: T.A.T.U. Revisited

Post-Google has been lightly researching the Russian fake lesbian teen pop duo TATU - and in our studies (which will abruptly end HERE with this post) we'd like to say "Hats off to TATU (or T.A.T.U.) who do a positively stellar job of using their fake lesbianism to jump-start their popularity and who have no qualms with objectifying the teenage female body..." not to mention the video of the ditzy MTV intro in which 15-year-old girls chat about how "hot" the guys backstage are (namely "Wolverine" Hugh Jackman, who must be over twice their age.)
Neither Russia nor Post-Google care very much about the so-called crime known as statutory rape, but in the United States isn't is supposed to be one of those societal super-evils on-par with child molestation? So why would MTV have this? Hmm... anyhow, here is the T.A.T.U. video where hundreds of teenage girls flood the stage and dance around as they strip down to their underwear- ENJOY!


berlin amanda bynes & hilary duff tatu all the things she said Not Gonna Get Us live mtv music awards tv tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google 2008 2009 pregnant

Labels:

Google Book Search

Post Titled: Let's Paint, Exercise, & Blend Drinks TV!

Labels: , ,

Google Book Search

Post Titled: Trailer for Quintin Tarantino's Inglorious Basterds...
whaaaat am I supposed to think about a trailer like this, huh?:
Inglorious Bastards preview video

Labels:

Google Book Search

Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Post Titled: Recent paintings by Francisco Guerrero...


berlin tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google artist painter seattle california franc 2008

Labels:

Google Book Search

Post Titled: non-fiction conversation blip, working from home
PJT: Whoa, holy shit, I totally twittered that Amsterdam plane crash 38 minutes faster than the NY Times did...
PTF: Uhm... you're talking about a tragedy.
PJT: I know, I know, but it mean in terms of the way information travels it is crazy. Even that twitpic photo of the crash from the highwaytraffic was 40 minutes before the NYtimes post.
PTF: Yea... is it satisfying to have beaten the NYtimes?
PJT: Fuck yea, it's a race! I love it. And it just goes to further prove that the Newspapers are dinosaurs.
(30 minutes later):
PTF: Oh, on that note: "Troubled San Francisco (Chronicle) paper in danger of closing"
PJT: Mhh.
Google Book Search

Post Titled: PAUL DIDDY 3.0 is up. Paul Tyree-Francis artist painter berlin tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google 2008 2009

Labels:

Google Book Search

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Post Titled: non-fiction, Feb. 23-24, daylight hours...


Google Book Search


Post Titled: "This shit's getting way too complicated for me"
President of United States Barack Obama swearing up a storm: HERE

Labels:

Google Book Search

Monday, February 23, 2009

Post Titled: Рена Эффенди. Фотографии -great fotos photos of life in Kyrgyzstan by Rena Effendi.

Labels:

Google Book Search

Google Book Search

Sunday, February 22, 2009

Post Titled: non-fiction, the Kiez under snowfall. 1am, Feb.22, 2009


Google Book Search

Friday, February 20, 2009

Post Titled: non-fiction, the quest for a fraking ermäßigung for my bvg Monatskarte
USEFUL INFO: IN BERLIN YOU CAN GET A DISCOUNT ON YOUR MONTHLY PASS FOR THE U-BAHN IF YOU GO TO THE BVG TICKET COUNTER WITH A LETTER WHICH SAYS YOU ARE AN INTERN AND A PASSPORT-SIZED PHOTO FOR YOUR ACCOMPANYING AUSBILDUNGSAUSWEIS: At the time of this post the Monatskarte was €52, which is a €20 discount.
RESUME POST: I have been riding schwarz for a few days now, getting nervous- since the only time (luckily) that I DID buy a kurzstrecke was also the time i got kontrolled-
sooo, I heard that if I have a letter that says I am in intern that I can get a reduced-price ticket for the u-bahn. I get the letter and ride schwarz to Alex where the bvg offices are and give it to the teller:
"Aaaaber sie brauchen einen foto!"
"Huh?"
"foto! ja. foto!"

I interpret this to mean that to avoid being swindled that my foto must be included ON the letterhead which says I am an intern.
frack.
since the Germans include their fotos on their CVs when applying for jobs, this automatically does not seem unreasonable, so I grumble fumble and go into Galleria Kaufhof with the Marketplace (with Cy Risdall) podcast in my headphones and wander like a zombie just looking for a xerox machine- finally I ask the woman in the statiuonary dept.
"habt ihr zufällig irgendwo eine farb-fotokopiemachine hier?"
"ja, 3.- NEE- 5. -5. stock!"

I go up, search and search, ask again- apparently is is in the giftwrapping dept. go there, oooh- it is only schwarzweis- how the hell am I going to pull off the color signature and stamp in b/w? shit, it'll just have to do-
I ask the giftwrapping ladies for scissors as I bogart a large table space to conduct my obviously shady cut-paste-embed recopy of my official letter to include a foto so I can get my goddamn ermäßigung on my Monatskarte. all goes well... except I am not satisfied with the b/w, and after having made my fair share of very valid-looking alterations to my military ID in college (which were always way better than Vern's) so that i could buy alcohol and go to bars, my standards for falsifying documents are fairly high.
I ride one stop to Rosa-Luxembourg and find an internet cafe which existed in my mind (and : surpise, in reality as well) who had a color copier. the guy had to change out the ink but had no qualms with my shadiness.
I returned to Alex with my freshly forged document and went to another bvg office, presented my letter (now with color foto!) and the guy basically said: "yea, great, but do you have a foto?"
"foto???"

he holds up a blank Ausbildungsausweis and points to the portion where my foto would go
"foto!" point-point-point.
"ohhh..."

jeeez. all I needed was a passport-style headshot, which was still taped to the document in my pocket which was identical to the one he held in his hand... I couldn't very well pull out the duplicate and peel off the cheap-y paper printout of a scan of my old passport foto which I#d stuck on there to copy...
"ahhh! foto, ok"
"but one bigger than this"
"ok!"

so I switche the fake letter with the embedded scan out with the original letter and went to the other side of the train station to the teller I#d originally gone to and presented my
"foto!"
all was well, she expertly yet absurdly riveted the paper foto to the Ausbildungsausweis and I waled away with an ermäßigt Monatskarte... and a sense of ... I don't even know what. After so many painfully frustrating and seemingly impossible experiences with german bureaucracy now I just expect my interactions with bureaucrats to be painfully inconvenient and nearly insurmountable or (at least) to be way way way too time-comsuming... embedded inconvenience. How does(has) this country function(ed) for so long like this??? Anyhow, paranoid false alarm- my fault! oui.
Google Book Search

Tuesday, February 17, 2009


Post Titled:(a new drawing)...
berlin tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google 2008 drawing drawings paintings painter artwork 2009

Labels:

Google Book Search

Sunday, February 15, 2009


Post Titled: Patrick Stewart (self-explanatory)
BONUS FEATURES!: dialogue resulting in this image!:
"That most beautifulest woman in the world- from the film about the crazy mathematician"
"yea, Jennifer Connelly- she was bustier in the Rocketeer... I don't actually know what she was doing between then and Labyrinth"
(Google image search for a visual history of Ms. Connelly's look and weight as it has evolved throughout the last 23 years leads the apartment to a site full of celebrity wallpaper images) (I am once again creepily reminded of David Bowie's Goblin King's obsession with a 14-year old girl... a detail I completely overlooked as a child.)
TWITTERED: "Stumbled across a Patrick Stewart screensaver accidentally. I am not clever enough to THINK to search for such an amazing thing"
"Ahh, from House of Sand and Fog!"
"No--"
"no, that is him!"
"no, that was an actor named Ben Kingsley, this is Patrick Stewart..."
Ben Kingsley was in Sand and Fog, he also played Gandhi...(THINKING: OPPOSITE Murphy Brown, Mary Tyler Moore ripoff..."
GOOGLE reveals that Gandhi's full name is Mohandas Karamchand Gandhi
GOOGLE IMAGES OF BOTH MEN FOR PURPOSES OF COMPARISON
"AHH..."
"See, the eyes are different and Ben Kingsley has bigger nose and ears... not much bigger, but bigger"

WIKIPEDIA reveals that they both acted together at the Royal Shakespeare Company earlier in their careers... presumably when both had more hair. I wonder if people could tell them apart then. (NOTE: see what happens when you work at home??? See?!?!) berlin tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google 2008 2009

Labels:

Google Book Search

Post Titled: Gang Gang Dance European Tour canceled?
Apparently- as heard through the email vine, received on Valentine's Day:

"...the band have had all the gear burnt in fire last night in Amsterdam...which is a disaster...
At the moment, the whole euro tour is cancelled but should we manage to save the berlin (and other) shows. I'll let you know

Cheers..."

-very sad!!!

Labels:

Google Book Search

Thursday, February 12, 2009

Post Titled: Les Haferflocken Swingers
@ Yorckschlösschen


"Its all just fun & games so get your freak on in this ancient jazz bar! As dirty as jazz can get! No one hit wonder no acapella boygroup no Elton John just spicy hot jazz

Friday, February 13th, 22h, @ Yorckschlösschen, Yorckstrasse 15, Kreuzberg, Berlin"

Labels: , , , ,

Google Book Search

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

Post Titled: THINGS WHICH I WOULDN'T MIND SO MUCH IF THEY WERE SUDDENLY MADE TOTALLY ILLEGAL:
1. Just eating half a banana and leaving the rest in the fruit bowl.

2.Completely re-titling films for international release (case in point: in German Annie Hall is titled Der Stadtneurotiker
Google Book Search

Post TItled: Maybachufer Orientalmarkt (aka Türkishe markt, Tues. & Fri.) gettin' groceries...
BEFORE
AFTER

berlin tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google 2008 2009 kreuzberg painter artist
(HINT:if you don't eat the fruit and vegetables within 2-3 days after buying them from the Turkish Market then they grow white-green fur.)
Google Book Search

Tuesday, February 10, 2009

Post Titled:
the pecking orders

the beauty of being unemployed is that the spell is broken: suddenly the idea of another human being telling YOU what to do seems laughable... and putting oneself back into a situation where that is the basis of your relationship with another person is almost laughable... ahh... society. How did this all begin? WHo would ever let another person tell them what to do or when they could take a break... (well, most of us would- and DO- actually) it is all pitiful and disgusting in many ways, really. Insulting to life itself... but it got started somehow... rams banging horns. Power structures. Nevertheless... the near-complete lack of structure in life is also overwhelming...
berlin tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google 2008 2009 control

Labels:

Google Book Search

Sunday, February 08, 2009






Post Titled: creative Sunday procrastination leads to me taking more photos of objects within shooting range...
Google Book Search

Post Titled: non-fiction post midnight whatever today's date is
Post Subtitled:
I showed up to the Berlinale film release party for the YES MEN film with about €18 in my pocket and left with €57... thanks bar fairy! (at the crowded bar she shoved a bill and some change in my hand, I shoved it into my pocket and then got a nice surprise when I checked my pocket 2 hours later. oops)
So yea- there was a corresponding exhibit of work which featured prints mimicking Shepard Fairey's Obama Hope posters but with the likes of Greenspan and Paulson, all with a brief and biting life history on the back... the magical fantastic wizards of our broken and so so beautiful financial crisis or blessing (however you want to look at it.)

Dance room= Loud loud schizo nearly undancable music, but fun and fun videos on the wall, and a heated debate about whether or not micheal gondry or his bizzaro was leaning against a nearby pillar.


the everyman's Yes Men reference? they did this:


too tired to check out the party across the street which supposedly featured cockroach racing. like going to bed early these days. then... hunted... cheese in the morning, read BILD zeitung.

Labels:

Google Book Search

Saturday, February 07, 2009

Post Titled: FAIL! FAIL! FAIL!
(or: how we accidentally spent hours projecting FAIL BLOG onto the big screen and lauging our asses off...) How? Well:








FAIL BLOG

Labels:

Google Book Search

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Post Titled: first post from a Mac... test test
Google Book Search

post titled: post-midnight non-fiction blurb regarding the PC, the NES, and TI

In 1985 or 86 my grandfather brought over a Texas Instrument computer. The "computer" consisted of just one over-sized keyboard with a cartridge slot up in the right hand side for those bulky (usually black) game or program cartridges (which appeared to be similar to ATARI ones but were clearly not. The computer had no monitor but rather plugged directly into a tiny black and white television. David, the thick-haired nerdy older brother of an idiot friend of mine from down the street. would come over and show me programming things, -he'd type code that would cause my name to repeat on the screen forever until you pressed ESC. David now works for NASA. Sometimes Dad would bring audio cassette tapes home from the guys at work and supposedly there were actually computer games on them. You had to somehow hook the cassette up and load the data into the computer but I never recall this actually working, I only recall playing the games in my mind in anticipation and imagining the labyrinths, warlocks, and 2D excitement. I did get s few games and kept them in my mom's slender KEDS shoebox on the table next to the monitor. Circa 1986-7 the spoiled kids in the neighborhood all got Nintendo Entertainment Systems. This wave of consoles made the TI and Ataris somewhatirrelevant. We spent a lot of time at their houses anyhow because they had much better toys and more playroom space that we did, but witht he dawn of the Nintendo we suddenly spent hundreds of man-hours frustrating ourselves to no end over Metroid, Contra, Castlevania, all the Mario Bros. and of course Mike Tyson's Punch-Out. We always played for for as long as out parents wold allow us to. I don't think this prevented us from playing in the woods or using out imaginations, we did plenty of that as well. Afterall, parents mistrusted this newfangled variety of home "entertainment", and would often turn off the TV or console saying " c'mon! time to go play outside!" Little did they know how long it took us to get to that crucial point in the game, it took so much time adn effort actually that we would leave the consoles on overnight hoping that they didn't freeze just to preserve our progress. For example, the final showdown on the bridge above the lava with a fire-throwing/breathing Koopa, or Little Joe vs. Mike Tyson himself. All that work lost and the push of a button usually pressed by TJ's mom, a woman who wore long floral-print t-shirts, and did nothing except sit on the pastel pink couch (that we were not allowed to sit on), eat liqueur-filled chocolates, and watch soaps in a state of captivation. This beast was our juggernaut.
In the early 1990s we got a PC. After that, regular trips tot he hardware store turned into hours-long visit to the COMP USA at Tyson's Corner, which was basically a computer mecca. On weekends it was packed full of dorks. People, actually... people who were curious and thirsty for whatever these things were capable of doing. Dads liked spreadsheets and kids liked games. Dad would wander off and I would spend hours inn the game aisle drooling over the cereal-box-sized games rattling with 4,5,6 floppy disks for such titles as Wing Commander, Home Alone, Lemmings and Indiana Jones: the Fate of Atlantis or Monkey Island while pretending not to glance out the side of my eye at the Leisure Suit Larry cover. If I waited long enough the "guys at work" would often copy these disks and send them home with my father, but of course one could only install one or two at a time since hard drive memory was scarce and precious...
In high school I got a TI-82 graphing calculator for math class, that was the first time I'd re-encountered Texas Instruments since that first computer ten years prior. I kind-of love that logo.

Google Book Search

Post Titled: fiction, 2nd of february...

A few young people are seen walking through the woods, goofing off, and they suddenly come upon an abandoned elementary school gymnasium more or less in the middle of the wilderness, which is the bud of an abandoned development miles between track housing ont he edges of two major suburban hubs. This enormous space stands alone- a separate building, and shortly after the discovery of this space (which also includes a bunker beneath) the people begin to work...
Years later yet another group comes along. They also come along the space, but by then the interior has been turned into an indoor pine forest, with the ground being a complex network of sleeping spaces and shanties, shacks and taverns once lit by wood stoves and candles all covered in moss or in various stages of refreshing pine-scented decay and regrowth, blue black evening prevails, frogs croak and crickets chirp forever.
Google Book Search

Monday, February 02, 2009

Post TItled: Very lucky BONG company gets free Olympic sponsorship.

Michael Phelps horribly addicted to gateway crazydrug "pot"!
berlin tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google 2008 Michael Phelps bong hit bong rip smokes pot gets caught marijuana
(sorry, I wouldn't usually blog about this but is is just really funny...)

Labels:

Google Book Search

post titled: non-fuggin'-fiction, xberg, neukölln, f'hain...
berlin tar art rat "post-google" tarartrat post google 2008 laura bean the runaway brides



Labels: , ,

Google Book Search